It is very important to have an understanding of what behaviors children are capable of when.  Knowing developmental capacities can make parenting easier and growing up less stressful!

We wouldn’t expect two- year -olds to be able to do geometry, for example, but when we ask them to sit still, listen, not touch, or stop doing something immediately, we are being just as unrealistic.  These capacities develop over time as the brain becomes more developed. 

Expecting behaviors from children for which they are not yet developmentally wired can lead to great frustration for both children and parents.    We often have a limited understanding of what children are capable when. Child development seems to be one of the best kept secrets.

Zero to Three a leading national organization in child development conducted a survey, Parent Survey Reveal Expectation Gap for Parents of Young Children found that:

1. “56 percent of parents believe that children have the impulse control to resist the desire to do something forbidden before age 3, and 36 percent believe that children under age 2 have this kind of self-control.  However, brain research shows that these skills start developing between 3.5 and 4 years and take many more years to be used consistently.”

• “43 percent of parents think children can share and take turns with other children before age 2.  In fact, this skill develops between 3 to 4 years.”

• “24 percent of all parents believe that children are able to control their emotions such as not having a tantrum when frustrated at 1 year or younger, while 42 percent believe children have this ability by 2 years.  Research shows this type of self-control is also just starting to develop between 3.5 and 4 years.”

While we wouldn’t expect two- year -olds to be able to do geometry, for example, when we ask them to sit still, listen, not touch, or stop doing something immediately, we are being just as unrealistic.  These capacities develop over time as the brain becomes more developed. 

Imagine all the battles, tears and punishments that could be avoided once we have this knowledge of what we can and cannot expect at different stages.  Having a good understanding of ages and stages can lead to happier, healthier and better adjusted children. 

We tend to underestimate the capacities of newborns and infants and overestimate those of toddlers.  Unrealistic expectations can result in missing opportunities to foster optimal development during different stages.  Not recognizing the communication skills of newborns and infants, for example, can impede how we communicate with them and lead to our missing the opportunity of enhancing their development during this period.

In a survey by the national organization, Zero to Three, it was found that 43 percent of parents expected that children should be able to share by the age of three.  The research has demonstrated that children do not develop the ability to share until between the ages of 3 to 4.

33% of parents thought that children under two years of age have enough control over their impulses to prevent them from doing something they are not supposed to be doing and 56% thought that children under the age of 3 should be able to control their impulses.  Again, the research tells us that children cannot control the impulses until 3 and one half to 4 years of age.

_____________________________________________________

Expecting behaviors from children for which they are not developmentally wired for yet, is often the cause of great frustration for parents and upset for children. 

A solid understanding of what we can expect developmentally when can make for happier children and less stressed parents!!

The lessons from neuroscience are so important to our understanding of children and how they develop.  Parenting that is guided by this information can lead to children achieving their optimal potential.

When we understand the science, we see that the goal of the first three years of life is not just to behave well, but to be well.  And our understanding of what we can expect when can help children develop optimally and without the wear and tear that can come from unrealistic expectations and behavior being perceived as misbehavior, rather than a developmental limitation.

Expecting behaviors from children for which they are not developmentally wired for yet, is often the cause of great frustration for parents and upset for children. 

A solid understanding of what we can expect developmentally when can make for happier children and less stressed parents!!

The lessons from neuroscience are so important to our understanding of children and how they develop.  Parenting that is guided by this information can lead to children achieving their optimal potential

Parent Survey Reveals Expectation Gap for Parents of Young Children

Conducted by the national organization, Zero to Three, 2016

Below has survey’s from diff years mixed

It is very important to have an understanding of what behaviors children are capable of when.  Knowing developmental capacities can make parenting easier and growing up less stressful!

We wouldn’t expect two- year -olds to be able to do geometry, for example, but when we ask them to sit still, listen, not touch, or stop doing something immediately, we are being just as unrealistic.  These capacities develop over time as the brain becomes more developed. 

Expecting behaviors from children for which they are not yet developmentally wired can lead to great frustration for both children and parents.    We often have a limited understanding of what children are capable when. Child development seems to be one of the best kept secrets.

Zero to Three a leading national organization in child development conducted a survey, Parent Survey Reveal Expectation Gap for Parents of Young Children found that:

1. “56 percent of parents believe that children have the impulse control to resist the desire to do something forbidden before age 3, and 36 percent believe that children under age 2 have this kind of self-control.  However, brain research shows that these skills start developing between 3.5 and 4 years and take many more years to be used consistently.”

• “43 percent of parents think children can share and take turns with other children before age 2.  In fact, this skill develops between 3 to 4 years.”

• “24 percent of all parents believe that children are able to control their emotions such as not having a tantrum when frustrated at 1 year or younger, while 42 percent believe children have this ability by 2 years.  Research shows this type of self-control is also just starting to develop between 3.5 and 4 years.”

While we wouldn’t expect two- year -olds to be able to do geometry, for example, when we ask them to sit still, listen, not touch, or stop doing something immediately, we are being just as unrealistic.  These capacities develop over time as the brain becomes more developed. 

Imagine all the battles, tears and punishments that could be avoided once we have this knowledge of what we can and cannot expect at different stages.  Having a good understanding of ages and stages can lead to happier, healthier and better adjusted children. 

We tend to underestimate the capacities of newborns and infants and overestimate those of toddlers.  Unrealistic expectations can result in missing opportunities to foster optimal development during different stages.  Not recognizing the communication skills of newborns and infants, for example, can impede how we communicate with them and lead to our missing the opportunity of enhancing their development during this period.

In a survey by the national organization, Zero to Three, it was found that 43 percent of parents expected that children should be able to share by the age of three.  The research has demonstrated that children do not develop the ability to share until between the ages of 3 to 4.

33% of parents thought that children under two years of age have enough control over their impulses to prevent them from doing something they are not supposed to be doing and 56% thought that children under the age of 3 should be able to control their impulses.  Again, the research tells us that children cannot control the impulses until 3 and one half to 4 years of age.

_____________________________________________________

Expecting behaviors from children for which they are not developmentally wired for yet, is often the cause of great frustration for parents and upset for children. 

A solid understanding of what we can expect developmentally when can make for happier children and less stressed parents!!

The lessons from neuroscience are so important to our understanding of children and how they develop.  Parenting that is guided by this information can lead to children achieving their optimal potential.

When we understand the science, we see that the goal of the first three years of life is not just to behave well, but to be well.  And our understanding of what we can expect when can help children develop optimally and without the wear and tear that can come from unrealistic expectations and behavior being perceived as misbehavior, rather than a developmental limitation.

Expecting behaviors from children for which they are not developmentally wired for yet, is often the cause of great frustration for parents and upset for children. 

A solid understanding of what we can expect developmentally when can make for happier children and less stressed parents!!

The lessons from neuroscience are so important to our understanding of children and how they develop.  Parenting that is guided by this information can lead to children achieving their optimal potential

Parent Survey Reveals Expectation Gap for Parents of Young Children

Conducted by the national organization, Zero to Three, 2016

Below has survey’s from diff years mixed